There is a new virus going around, called "work". If you receive any sort of "work" at all, whether via e-mail, Internet or simply handed to you by a colleague...DO NOT OPEN IT.
Work has been circulating around our building for months and those who have been tempted to open "work" or even look at "work" have found that their social life is deleted and their brain ceases to function properly. If you do encounter "work" via e-mail or are faced with any "work" at all, then to purge the virus, send an e-mail to your boss with the words "Sorry...I'm off to the pub". The "work" should automatically be deleted from your brain.
If you receive "work" in paper-document form, simply lift the document and drag the "work" to your garbage can. Put on your coat and skip to the nearest bar with two friends and order three pints of beer. After repeating this action 14 times, you will find that "work" will no longer be of any relevance to you.
Send this message to everyone in your address book. If you do not have anyone in your address book, then I'm afraid the "work" virus has already corrupted your life.